Everybody drops the baby.
Last week I got to snuggle my friend’s brand new baby.
Baby Lucy is so new, she still had that new baby smell.
She’s absolutely tiny, WAY smaller than my babies were.
And as I held her, she snuggled into my neck the way snuggly babies do.
My friend and I chatted about motherhood and the things that no one tells you
Before you bring your first one home.
And I offered her my favorite baby shower advice:
“Everybody drops the baby.”
She looked at me, questioning.
So I explained:
Everyone I know has dropped their baby,
Baby has rolled off the bed, or the changing table strap breaks.
We’re carrying Baby on our hip and bonk their head on the doorway as we go through.
We cut Baby’s finger when we’re trying to cut those fast-growing fingernails.
And when it happens, we feel like we’re the absolute worst.
That no one else could possibly be as bad a parent as we are.
We keep this secret shame tucked away in our pockets,
Afraid of what others would say about us - to us - if they knew.
But when we’re brave enough to confide in someone we trust,
We usually learn that they, too, have had a similar experience.
One way or another, they’ve dropped the baby.
Too many of us spend too much of our lives walking around with shame -
Literally or metaphorically dropping the baby
Getting reprimanded at work when we were honestly doing our best
Sticking our foot in our mouth
Letting someone down
Failing. Over and over.
And we don’t want to talk about any of it.
We don’t want people to pity us.
Or blame us.
Or shun us.
Or any of the other unknowns.
But when we’re brave enough to talk about it,
To share our stories,
We learn we’re not alone.
I’m grateful that being vulnerable - at least writing with vulnerability -
Comes easily to me.
And though each time I share, a small part of me worries -
Maybe this will be the time someone thinks I’m crazy.
It never happens.
Instead, each time I am willing to get vulnerable,
To empty my pockets,
To let go of some of the shame I’m holding,
I’m met with some version of
“Oh! Me too. I thought I was the only one!”
Life is hard.
And it’s harder when we try to do it alone.
Let’s not let shame make us feel like we have to.
Our journals can be our partners,
Our safe place where we can start sharing our secrets.
Where we can process what happened,
How we feel about it,
And what we make it mean.
All too often, we don’t write these things
Because of some fear that others may find it and read our most shameful moments.
All too often, we keep our shame bottled up,
Hidden away,
Judging ourselves before others can judge us.
My friend, your journal never judges you.
And there’s no need to judge yourself.
Not for your words, your ideas, your stories,
Your spelling, your grammar, your penmanship.
Any of it.
Let your journal in.
Let the shame out, gently.
Find your community and share with authenticity and vulnerability.
So we can connect and support each other.
Because everybody drops the baby.
Journal Prompts
Use these prompts as written or as inspiration to uncover what you need in your life this week. And know that I’m always here to support you and answer questions you have along the way!
What are those things that you keep hidden? Those shameful moments you keep stuffed down inside?
What would happen if you let them out?
What are you afraid of?
Why have you been holding on so tightly to them?
What if you write them out?
What if you let them go?
Who is a safe person you can trust with this knowledge?
How can you release them so you can move forward?
Year End Reflection & Goal Setting Session
Have you been meaning to do a really solid review of your year? Set some goals for 2024?
Maybe you’ve been busy, or maybe you aren’t quite sure how to do it.
This month in my membership program, I’ve been leading a group of journalers through my proven year end reflection process. Here’s what they’ve been saying:
"It's made me realize how amazing this year has been and it feels really good to take the time to lean into that - acknowledging it, and appreciating it."
"This year-end reflection helped me put all the pieces together in magical ways. ✨"
If you want to get in on the action and start 2024 with confidence and momentum,
I invite you to join me for a special journaling session on Wednesday, December 27 from 12 - 3pm Eastern.
We’ll acknowledge and celebrate what we’ve done and who we’ve become this year, set our intentions for who we want to be next year, create goals to help us get there, and seal it all by selecting a word to serve as our theme.
Is Journaling on Your List for 2024?
I’m here to provide support, resources, encouragement, and accountability! Wanna chat about it? Book time on my calendar here. Be sure to bring your journal to our session!
Happy Journaling!
