There is no "right" timeline.
There is no “right” timeline.
We each grow at our own pace.
My whole life I’ve had this sense that I am behind.
That I need to move faster,
Work harder,
Be more.
That I’m lagging behind this arbitrary self-imposed deadline
That I didn’t bother to tell myself about
Until it was too late to make it.
So I hustle harder,
Up my speed,
Do all the things.
And find myself crashing and burning.
Over and over and over again
I’ve done this.
Beating myself up for not being further along in my life.
Comparing myself with others
Even though I know we all have our own path
Our own pace
Our own purpose.
And even though I know
That every time I play the comparison game,
No matter how I stack up,
I always lose
Sometimes I find myself playing anyway.
But when I can remember that
I am exactly where I need to be
Doing exactly what I need to be doing
Learning exactly when I’m ready to learn
Everything in my life is better.
On Thursday morning,
I finally started seeds for my garden.
I spent three glorious hours with my hands in the dirt
Preparing tray after tray of flowers.
(And, yes, tomatoes too!)
I know from experience that seeds don’t grow right away.
They need the darkness of the soil
Plenty of moisture
And time.
I didn’t expect to see any sprouts for a week at least.
But last night as I was spritzing the trays with water,
I saw some little sprouts peeking out of the soil.
Just three days after I planted them!
Perhaps they were buried a little shallower than the rest.
Perhaps these seeds were fresher.
(These in the photo below are sprouts from dahlia seeds
I harvested myself last year.)
Perhaps they are just eager to begin the new phase of their lives.
These early sprouts don’t take anything away
From the seeds that haven’t germinated yet.
Just because they’re overachievers
Doesn’t mean that the other seeds are late in sprouting.
Dahlia seeds generally take 10-14 days to germinate
So the other seeds have plenty of time.
They’re not behind.
They’ll grow when they’re ready.
In another tray, I saw more seedlings -
This time yarrow, which I had surface sown.
They want to be on top of the soil to germinate,
Not buried underneath.
They need light to grow.
Had I buried them like I had other seeds,
They would never germinate.
When I give each type of seed
The right conditions to grow,
They’ll germinate at exactly the right time for them.
People are exactly the same way -
We each need something a little different
So that we can learn, grow, and thrive.
What I need might be a little different from what you need.
Maybe my challenges seem harder than yours.
Maybe I find myself with fewer resources than you.
Maybe I feel like I’m at some kind of disadvantage.
And if I spend my time comparing myself to you
And how fast you’re growing,
I’ll never feel enough.
But when I focus on what’s within my sphere of control -
Taking care of myself
Learning from my experiences
Being responsible for my thoughts, words, and actions
I find I end up exactly where I need to be
When I need to be there.
And when I get frustrated,
When I feel I’m falling behind,
Like I’ll never be able to catch up,
A quick read through any volume of my old journals
Will confirm to me that it’s okay.
That I’m okay.
That I’ve felt like this before
And found my way through.
That I know how to focus on what I need to grow.
And I can do it again this time.
And, best of all,
That I am exactly where I need to be.
If you want help creating a practice that helps you do this, let’s chat!
Journal Prompts
Use these prompts as written or as inspiration to uncover what you need in your life this week. And know that I’m always here to support you and answer questions you have along the way!
How are you feeling about where you are?
How much time are you spending comparing yourself to others?
What do you need to focus on so you can learn and grow?
How can you take better care of yourself?
Who can help you remember that you’re exactly where you need to be?
Journaling Fun and Support
My weekly livestream is back! Join me on Tuesdays at 8pm Eastern as I welcome a series of guests who do interesting, fun things that tie into journaling! This week, I welcome my friend Jessika Portney Amini to talk about The Enneagram! Tune in on LinkedIn, YouTube, or Facebook (if you’re my mom!). Missed last week’s session on Spiritual Magic? Catch it HERE.
Have you signed up yet for the 7-Day Journaling Challenge? Seven of my favorite sets of journal prompts delivered straight to your inbox over the next week, designed to help you get to know yourself better. Because self-discovery —> self-compassion —> self-love. And isn’t that what the world needs now? Love, sweet self-love. Register for free HERE.
Happy Journaling!
